This is the blog of a guy that have Avoidant Personality Disorder about the things he likes and he dislikes.
I will answer here a few questions.
What is Avoidant Personality Disorder (AvPD) ? : You can check the definition of wikipedia A more complete definition is here The book “Distancing” by Martin Kantor is good. The book “Personality Disorders in Modern Life” by Theodore Millon is good too. Basically it means that I don’t like myself and I avoid people because I’m convinced that they will reject me and I don’t trust them. Online, I’m less avoidant than in real-life, probably because I can keep my distance.
What do you do professionally ? : I’m a software developer.
Where do you live ? : In Quebec (Canada). I’m French-Canadian, Tabarnak :)
What do you think of religion ? : I’m an atheist that admire Richard Dawkins. For me religion is stupid.
What do you like ? : I’m a living encyclopedia about horror, science-fiction and exploitation movies. I have several books about them and more than 1000 movies. I have more than 400 science-fiction books (classics of the 1940s-1970s). I love classic rock of the 1970s-1980s. I’m interested in ancient history too. I have lots of books about science. I play video games from time to time. The typical pastime of a shut-in.
How can a guy with AvPD can meet a woman ? : A guy with AvPD doesn’t meet women, it’s women that meet him. As Clint Eastwood said : A man’s got to know his limitations.
Here is what happens when a woman meet a guy with AvPD (it’s a comment by Chic Noir on Lady Raine’s blog):
*chic noir yells*
No more mr nice guy yehhhhh!!!! where have you been my e-friend.
*chic noir wraps arms around no more mr. nice guy*
* mr. nice guy runs away*
chic noir: wait wait come back.
Can you leave the house ? There is a difference between AvPD and agoraphobia. I can leave the house and in the past I loved to take long walks outside (alone), but I cannot mix with people.
Why do you know so much about PUAs ? : I was in shyness forums before. In all shyness forums you will have PUAs that try to help guys. But these guys cannot go in a club and pickup chicks. Furthermore they want a girlfriend, not a one-night-stand. So by reading shyness forum, you will learn about this stuff, but you cannot put it in practice. A good book about dating is “Mode One” by Allan Roger Currie. It’s not a PUA book, it’s a book about the various way men approach women to have sex with them. Mode One guys are upfront with women – PUAs are like that. Mode Two are giving gifts to women – most guys are like that. Mode Three guys are too shy to approach women – guys that have AvPD,social phobia,social anxiety are like that. Mode Four guys are angry guys that cannot get laid.
Why do you know so much about MRAs (men’s right activists) ? : First of all most MRAs are angry guys that cannot get laid. Regularly you will see these misogynists showing up in shyness/dating forums because they want the guys that post there to give up about women. The reason for that is that angry guys that cannot get laid hate, hate, hate nerd males that have a girlfriend (it’s well explained in “Mode One” by Allan Roger Currie and he calls it the alpha male syndrome) and shyness forums are full of nerds that want a girlfriend. For misogynists, the only men that should have women are thugs and asshole – they constantly say that women are only attracted to thugs and assholes. For this reason many misogynists see themselves as experts in dating or seduction technique : they are a complete failure with women and want all other men to fail with them. And medically there are difference between the two group : shy men suffer from AvPD,social phobia,social anxiety (Cluster C) while angry guys that cannot get laid suffer from Narcissistic Personality Disorder/Psychopathy (Cluster B).
Why “No more mr nice guy” ? : Because of that :
It’s very tough to grab us. And I need to add that many guys with AvPD fall in love with women that have Borderline Personality Disorder (which is a severe mental problem) because these women are super extroverted. Any guys that has AvPD should read about Borderline Personality Disorder just in case he meets a woman like that.